Funny Love
by Tessela
Summary: Parenting isn't an easy task but someone has to do it and who better than a workaholic medic and an ex-missing nin . A series of drabbles rotating around the eventful everyday lives of Sakura and Itachi.
1. Cock-Blocked

**./.**

**Funny Love Drabble**

**O**

Cock-Blocked

**./.**

Today will be the day she told herself, today will be the day she and Itachi will finally make love to each other. It's been such a long time since she's felt the warmth of her lover's naked body against her or the feeling of his little 'pecker' bringing her over the edge and sending her to the moon. But ever since the birth of her eldest son and her recent twins, she's been _exhausted_ running around the house to take care of all three and Itachi has been equally supportive but the man could only do so much without boobs. Their eldest son, Jun is about to turn one and the little toddler, Jun, still continues to fight his father over a nipple but now they both have more competition with the twins. One a girl named Azula and the other a boy named Saizo and the two were downright breast hoggers, suckling her breast for minutes on end, their appetites were insatiable.

Did Sakura mention how exhausted she's been?

Did she also mention how horny she's been too? Oh she's been terribly frisky!

The pinkette tiptoed mindfully through the dark house, careful not to make the old wood beneath her feet squeak and give her away. She came up to a door and slowly slid it open to peek an emerald eye in the room to check up on Jun. She slowly crept into the infant's room and leaned over the rail of his crib.

The young boy did not stir as Sakura leaned down to brush her lips against his chubby rosy cheek. She lightly caressed a soft pink curl of his hair.

After easing out his room, she slid the door closed behind her and mentally jumped for joy. One down, two more to go.

The twin's room was more easier to maneuver through, it was more carpeted which made it easier to quell her footsteps. After checking up on Azula and Saizo, she kissed them both and quickly escaped before all would be in vain.

Sakura swore she was seconds from breaking her neck as she ran down the hall in demonic speed to her bedroom. Upon opening it, she was mindful to _slowly_ ease the door open, careful not to make even a peep as she shut it behind her.

"So are they asleep?" The unexpected sound of his voice made Sakura yelp as she felt strong arms wrap around her frame. Burying his face into her neck, Itachi breathed in her intoxicating scent of strawberry, oh how he cherished that scent. So pungent like a perfume yet so beautifully blended with her own natural scent like a splash. Sakura melted in his embrace as she turned to look at her lover despite the room was pitch black, only the light of the luminous moon as it peeked through the half closed curtains in their window.

"Yes, and trust me, if we play our cards right tonight, we can go _all night_ with out a peep from the peanut gallery." Sakura chuckled deviously as she held her lover's face in her hands and gently kissed his lips. Oh how she missed these lips. She wanted him so badly that is was hurting her that she hasn't devoured him, yet.

Itachi kissed her passionately, their lips molded in the heated kiss as he grabbed her hips and grind them into his, causing her to feel the strong bulge in his pants. He wanted her as much as she wanted him and the it burned in them like an insatiable fire.

"Did I ever mention you still look breathtaking?" He said as she began to lift her shirt and expose her bra-less post baby body which Itachi still all found ravishing. He actually preferred her more fuller frame over when she was petite and delicate. She use to be so fragile looking that he sometimes worried if they went too far, he would hurt her and that is the last thing he would ever want to do.

He could see her smile from the shadow the moon cast on the side of her face and she whispered "every single day." Itachi ran his fingers over her chest roughly and it caused Sakura to sharply take in breath in pain, why was her breast beginning to hurt her? Even as Itachi tweaked a hard nipple, it sent jolts of pain through her body and it made her want to cringe away but she fought the urge.

The pain did not subside even as Itachi moved his hot mouth against her sensitive breast, it actually felt even worse. Even as he circled her darkened nipple with his skillful tongue and kneaded her other with his free hand, she could feel nothing but pain coming from her breast and it was beginning to get hard to ignore. But she didn't want to ruin the moment, it was the moment they've been working so hard to get and finally they've gotten it and she's about to throw it all away on a little breast discomfort but this wasn't the only pain getting to her.

Come to think of it

She's been awfully cramping today. It started off as coming and going but now it's coming every other minute and when they came, it felt like someone was severely pinching her uterus. Could it be? She hasn't had it in a _long_ time and to see it now...why is mother nature such a bitch? Now she had to find the heart to tell Itachi before they went on any further.

"Itachi." She moaned, half aroused, half pained. The Uchiha flicked her tender nipple with his tongue and Sakura flinched at the pain it sent her. "You might want to stop." Sakura felt awful but she just couldn't take it anymore. Itachi looked confused as he lifted his head and Sakura instantly felt guilt but she just had to tell him.

"What's wrong Sakura?"He asked. Itachi held her close as she groaned 'you're going to hate me' into his chest. Itachi chuckled, clearly amused at her. If only he knew, she bitterly thought. The pinkette irritatedly sighed as she stuck her hands through her mess of hair and tugged at it as if life was killing her right now. After a moment, she dropped her hands and smiled sheepishly towards her loving husband.

"I think I've just started my period." It was Itachi's turn to groan in pain. He dropped his head into the crook of her neck and groaned 'the Kamis must hate me' into her shoulder whilst a guilty Sakura patted his back comfortingly. It wasn't the children who got in their way, but mother nature took the liberty of cock-blocking them this time. Sakura was never going to get a break because now...

She had four big babies to tend to.


	2. Reasoning

**./.**

**Funny Love Drabble**

**O**

Reasoning

**./.**

"Sakura, I assure you, they will be fine with their nanny." Said the Uchiha for the umpteenth time that night. He had been trying to convince his wife all that night that their children would indeed be safe while they were out. However Sakura was no where near convinced. "Do you not trust my judgment?"

"It's not that, it's that I know how they are and what they need! What happens if Saizo wants breast milk or Azula says her first words and we're not there to see it!" Sakura reasoned, then she gasped when realization dawned on her. "Anything could happen and we could miss it! You know this is like an essential time in our babies' lives."

Itachi rolled his eyes and coaxed the woman out the front door. "Come Sakura, you haven't been out of this house in almost a year. You need fresh air, my love, because anymore time here and you'll become my mother."

"But we don't have to go all the way out, we could have just had a romantic dinner in our kitchen!" Cried Sakura on her way down the steps.

"No. We are already dressed and out the door and I refuse to change. I want to show you off tonight to all our friends because quite frankly my love, you look _breathtaking_ in that dress." Said Itachi. He could feel Sakura's hand tremble as he took it and squeezed it comfortingly. Sakura thought maybe this wasn't such a bad idea to go out, it has been a long time since she's seen any of her friends. She felt grateful that Itachi had invited all her friends out for drinks. She hasn't seen half of them since she gave birth and she missed them so.

Now calm and visibly relaxed, Sakura allowed Itachi to usher her into the slick black Convertible and closed the door behind himself. Still with an ace up her sleeve she waited until he slid into the drivers side of the car before she leaned over the console and whisper seductively in his ear. "How about we skip dinner and drinks and we can just go back and play doctor? I'm feeling a little _sick._" Sakura knew this must be a low-blow to toy with him but she just had to do it and to make the offer more sweeter she leaned in further and _blew_ slow and sensually in his ear, causing the Uchiha to grip the steering wheel harshly, too appalled at her actions to react.

Sakura nearly cackled. She might have gone a little too far with that last move but desperate times call for desperate measures. She watched as Itachi's jaw tightened then released, contemplating whether or not to play her game but it unsettled her the way a smirk slowly broke across his face.

"A lovely offer Sakura but even with the dinner and drinks," he began to revive the engine, a clean purr vibrating the vehicle.

"At the end of the night, the doctor will be in."


	3. In-Laws

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**Funny Love Drabble**

**O**

In-Laws

**./.**

Heels clacked sharply against cement, she was accompanied by the light pitter-patter of feet behind her as they came up to rusty black gate. Sakura sighed as she peered down at her small children coming to a halt near her feet. Saizo exchanged a look with his mother, comfortingly tugging at the hem of her black dress, the toddler's wide dark eyes watching her attentively with an expression of intrigue at his mother's sudden melancholy demeanor. She tightened her grasp on the hand of her daughter, Azula, the small girl watched her mother take in a shallow breath and blow it out uneasily, seeing the visible strain on her mother as she tried to muster the courage to continue. The oldest, Jun said nothing as he move to be near his mother for comfort and support, being old enough to understand the situation, he attempted to alleviate the burden off his mother for this day by being the big boy and helping watch his little siblings so they wouldn't get into mischief and cause trouble for his mother.

Today was a hard day for everyone.

Sakura forced a smile as she tried to lighten the mood around them, walking with an involuntary pep in her step through the gates. "You guys ready to meet your grandma and grandpa?" She asked.

"Where is daddy?" Azula muttered as she clung close to her mother, startled by her surroundings as they passed unfamiliar buildings and houses, all collecting dust or beginning to deteriorate with time.

"He must be already with grandma and grandpa, he left a little earlier to meet up with your uncle, Sasuke." She replied. They walked through the shrine house, paying respects to the statue before heading into a familiar yard. Jun urged his siblings to keep quiet as Azula and Saizo became uneasy with the long silence that swelled around them. The tension was insufferable and they were beginning to grow restless with their mother's eerie silence.

Sakura came up to a long piece of granite slab stone. It had Kanji chiseled deeply on the surface with intricate designs decorating the frame of the rock. It appeared it was already cleaned and swept.

_'Looks like Sasuke's already been here to clean up.'_ She thought, smiling to herself at the thought of Sasuke and Naruto cleaning the grave, probably before dawn broke. She knew Sasuke had a thing for weakness and he was probably still too stuck up to even show emotion around his own friends, the exception for Naruto who stuck by his side almost like glue.

The pinkette decided the time was right and set down the weaved basket she had been carrying and laid out a blanket and a spread of various dishes. It was Mikoto, Fugaku, and Itachi's favorite foods and she had hope to run into Sasuke because she made a lunch just for him and Naruto as well. From the corner of her eye, she could spy a dark figure standing two stones down from her, his figure tall and lean and unmistakeable. The pinkette stood and brushed her dress off, grateful for Jun taking order for the moment.

Sakura moved to stand next to her husband who stood stones down from his parent's grave, in front of another familiar name. He didn't look over at her but could feel his wife's presence as she opened her mouth to speak.

"He would've loved them." She whispered comfortingly. She felt a pang in her chest as she watch a sad smile spread across his face as he shook his head.

_Uchiha Shisui_

"No..." He said.

"He would've found each and every one of them a pain in the ass."

**./.**

_Thank you to all who R&R!_

_This author's note is simple and sweet; this drabble is not all canon, so you may disregard this chapter,_

_I have many chapters in mind that consist of the Uchiha household alive and well_

_That includes the ever eccentric, Shisui!_

_~Tessela_


	4. Debate

**./.**

**Funny Love Drabble**

**O**

Debate

**./. **

"No"

"Yes,"

"No,"

"Yes,"

"I said no."

"But I said yes."

"Azula..."

"Daddy..."

"You will not stay in this bed."

"Yes I will."

"No you will not."

"..."

"..."

"Daddy, stop being so mean! You're such a meanie!" Azula screamed, taking one of the plush pillows and screaming into it like a brat. Itachi looked over to his wife in hopes for her support in the situation. He anticipated that she would step in and take his side.

"Nope, don't look at me, she is a daddy's little girl." Chuckled the pinkette from her book. Flipping another page from her novel whilst her husband mumble the word 'traitor' under his breath.

"Why can't Azula stay in this bed with you and mommy?!" Asked the child, her emerald eyes staring stubbornly at her father who cursed the Kamis for giving her not only the face of his beloved mother, Mikoto but gracing her with her stern look too.

"Don't you want a brother or sister, Azula? That can't happen if you're in the bed with us."Itachi replied sternly. The question seemed to stump the child, making her thin black eyebrows knit and her face scrunch tightly in thought.

Itachi rolled his eyes and crossed his arms impatiently whilst the child pondered the question. Then she came up with a solution.

"Well, make the bed bigger!" She concluded with confidence.

Itachi face palmed and Sakura chuckled heartily while burying her face in the book.

"You're not understanding, Azula." Itachi huffed, running a hand through his unbound locks. "Sakura, this is not funny." He glared at his wife who long put down her book and was failing to quell her laughter with her hand.

In the midst of their bickering, they did not notice the two sets of little feet padding into their room and towards the bed. The small children steered towards the pinkette's side of the bed, patting their mother lightly on the arm to get her attention.

"Mommy...Saizo was scared...I think he had a ni'mare" Mumbled Jun whilst he held Saizo's hand and rubbed the sleep from his eye with his free hand.

"Aww, my poor little baby, come here."Sakura smiled earnestly at her sons and lifted the youngest onto her lap. The little raven haired boy instantly snuggled into his mother's embrace and buried his self deep into her warm bosom while wrapped up in his favorite blue 'blankie.'

"Stop it, Sakura, you're encouraging them." Itachi demanded. Sakura smiled mirthfully at her sons, unfazed by Itachi's demand.

"No, I am not encouraging them. I am on neither side. I am just the mother." Sakura remarked, rubbing circles in her young son's back soothingly.

"Daddy, how about you let us all stay tonight, everyone's here!" Suggested Azula.

"No,"

"Jus' for the nigh'."

"No,"

"Pwease?"

"No,"

Azula Begged. "Jus' for da' nigh' and I swear no more for the wes' of this month, oh pwetty pwease!" The young girl clasped her small hands together and rested them underneath her chin whilst she poked her bottom lip out and batted her thick lashes. The plea somewhat moved the father who did favor his little girl more over his mama's boy sons. After a long tiresome sigh, he was swayed by her offer.

"Fine. You have a deal. This last time for the rest of this month." Said Itachi to the sound of a squeal of delight from Azula. The small child climb the chest of her father where she happily rested and moments later, fell asleep. Sakura had gathered Jun and held him close with her arm around him and the other cradling Saizo close to her heart.

"Looks like we've been overrun with rug-rats, again." Chuckled Sakura after a moment's peace when all the children were asleep. "Isn't this the 16th time this month?"

Itachi stared at the ceiling while lightly stroking the back of his daughter's head comfortingly.

"These brats are making me go soft."

Sakura chuckled, reaching over her eldest to give her beloved a chaste kiss on the lips, then one at the edge of his mouth. She left a trail of butterfly kisses to his ear and then she whispered into it.

"...Yea, seeing as though you just got into a whole debate with a five-year-old."

"Be quiet and go to sleep." Itachi reached over to his nightstand to turn off the lights and soon they were bathed in darkness, the only sounds were the gentle snores of their children.

"I love you..." murmured Sakura, slightly groggily.

It didn't take more than a minute later for Itachi to reply. "I love you too... Goodnight, my love."


End file.
